Just when you thought things had finally returned to normal after the pandemic, up pop Victorius to make you question your own sanity. Returning with their sixth full-length studio album (or second since going full dino-ninja bonkers) the five German nutters with a Gloryhammer sense of humour and an instant autocorrect for a name thrust Dinosaur Warfare Pt. 2 – The Great Ninja War (Napalm Records) onto an unsuspecting (Jurassic) world.
Intro ‘Saurus Invictus Lazerus’ raises the curtain in cinematic fashion, a film score opening backed by dinosaur roars, lasers, trumpeting mammoths and swords. Obviously. ‘Victorious Dinogods’ follows like Helloween playing a Jurassic Park guitar solo while the buffoonery continues with ‘Mighty Magic Mammoth’ charging onto the icy plains like Hammerfall having some sort of stroke.
Another song with an impressively preposterous title, ‘Jurassic Jetfighters’ is driven by a Stratovarius style guitar riff, more ludicrous lyrical imagery (“This is Tom Cruise. Welcome to the danger zone”) and another chorus you’ll be humming within moments. The dramatic orchestrations and choral backing of ‘Dinos and Dragons’ is followed by the mid-paced stomp of ‘Katana Kingdom Rising’ and the call to arms of ‘God of Roar’, an impressive cut way more catchy than it has any right to be.
Tied for first place in the battle for daftest title on the record, ‘Night of the Nuclear Ninja’ and ‘Triceps Ceratops’ both feature irresistible choruses and fist-pounding riffs, as does the epic bombast of ‘Tyrannosaurus Steel’ and the fretboard flurries of ‘Shadow of The Shinobi’ before the Hans Zimmer style orchestrations of the mighty ‘Powerzord’ close the record with a majestic bang.
Of course, for all of its apparent absurdity there has to be a certain level of talent involved to pull off something like this properly and that’s something Victorius has in spades. Who cares that you’ve probably heard every riff and sweep-picked solo a million times before? The fact that you’re able to predict where each melody is headed after only half a line and the knowledge that “iron” will absolutely be pronounced “i-run” simply adds to the fun.
In fact, Dinosaur Warfare Pt. 2 is delivered with such unashamed enthusiasm that you’ll be grinning like an idiot before you have a chance to stop yourself. Gloriously cheesy, feel-good European power metal at its finest.
8 / 10
GARY ALCOCK